Ancient Mayan Soccer Rule Turns Brazil into a German Colony After Brutal World Cup Loss
Due to a long-forgotten rule from the Mesoamerican soccer related game Ōllamaliztli, that dates back to the Mayan empire, Brazil officially became a German colony this week after a crushing 7-1 …
Facebook’s Mood-Manipulation Experiment Leads to Hundreds of Bizarre Murders
Just days after it was revealed that Facebook manipulated posts on nearly 700,000 users’ news feeds in 2012 to see how it affected their emotions, law enforcement agencies across the …
Edward Snowden Leaks New Documents Revealing “Independence Day” Defense Budget
New classified documents leaked by Edward Snowden show that the Pentagon has a special budget set aside just in case of an extraterrestrial attack similar to the one seen in the blockbuster film, …
Supreme Court Justices Unveil a Very Cute Scrapbook Commemorating Their Hobby Lobby Verdict
The nine Supreme Court justices who issued Monday’s hot-button ruling that Hobby Lobby is not required to provide its employees with access to certain contraceptives may have disagreed on the verdict, …
UAMS Sees Rise In Amnesia Cases After America’s Defeat In World Cup
The University of Arkansas Medical Center in Little Rock has reported a high spike in short-term amnesia cases following the game between America and Belgium in the World Cup, according …
Sen. Jason Rapert Proposes that All LGBTQ Arkansans be Placed on Island in Greers Ferry Lake
Sen. Jason Rapert has announced a new traditional-marriage initiative during today’s special legislative session at the Old State House. The initiative involves moving Arkansas’ LGBTQ population to Sugar Loaf Mountain, …
UAMS Student Discovers Controversial Cure for Women’s Prostate Cancer
LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — A freshman at the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences with may have stumbled upon a medical miracle this weekend when he devised a cure for women’s prostate …
22 People Arrested After Bar Fight Over Disagreement About Real Football
LITTLE ROCK – Police responded to a call to Vino’s BrewPub after a large fight erupted during the USA v Germany World Cup game today. Witnesses say the fight started …
Prisons Overflow Following Orange is the New Black Season Premiere
PINE BLUFF, Ark — The Arkansas Department of Corrections recently announced that following the season two premiere of the hit Netflix series “Orange is the New Black” (OITNB), prisons across …
Big Piney Creek Deemed Safe After Weeks of Hipster Contamination
DOVER—Sources confirmed on Sunday, June 15 that the level of hipsters in the Big Piney Creek swimming and camping area in Pope County has decreased to a safe level following …