RUSSELLVILLE–Sources confirm that the phenomenon known to haunt the area that locals call the Dover Lights has recently filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy at the Pope County courthouse earlier this week. The elusive spirit, rumored to have been one of the lost souls of early Spanish conquistadors in search of El Dorado, made a statement concerning his inability to make payments on his property and investments.
“Everyone assumes I’m wealthy,” said the ghost. “But for years I’ve been trying to get back the money I’ve saved for hundreds of years. That’s why when kids and drunks yell, ‘We have your gold!’ I go after them, because I could really use that to pay my bills.”
Without obtaining the riches he sought in City of Gold, the Dover Lights spectre will be forced to liquidate what assets he still possesses. Despite the financial setback, he remained optimistic about the future when speaking with sources. “My assessor told me that I can stay in the hollows for as long as I’d like, which is good because my current work involves scaring the locals. I’m looking forward to starting over with a clean slate.”
Before leaving the courthouse, the ghoul requested that if anyone had his gold that they return it to his residence as soon as possible.