Razorbacks, Fearing Rejection, Release Love Letter to Gus Malzahn

FAYETTEVILLE, Ark — The University of Arkansas today announced a new ad campaign around the upcoming head football coaching hire that begins today. The campaign, titled “Love, Arkansas Razorbacks” is directed at head coaching target Gus Malzahn.

The campaign comes after multiple reports that Malzahn has removed himself from the prospect list after securing a place in the SEC championship game and a potential spot in the College Football playoffs.

If the campaign sounds familiar, it is because the Razorbacks teamed up with the City of Little Rock and Stone Ward advertising after their successful “Love, Little Rock” campaign around the Amazon second headquarter bids. The concept is very similar here.

In an open letter than ran in today’s Auburn Plainsman student-run newspaper, the Razorbacks provide the following commentary

Dear Gus,

It’s not you, it’s us.

We know, we know, when we originally started looking for a head coach we targeted you big.

After all, you’re Gus. You’re smart, sexy, and frankly, incredibly talented. And thanks to our thriving football program, huge stadium expansion that seats very few people, and bizarre commitment to Pepsi products there are a lot of reasons why we’d be great together.

But when we started really thinking about what our future would look like, we realized it would probably never work out between us.

You want to win national championships. We have a sizable ego and an unquenchable underdog mentality. The fact is if we won all the time it would be a bummer. Our drivetime sports shows would be totally wrecked, and we can’t sacrifice that for you.

You want top level recruits and for us to keep the talented in-state prospects at home. It would be cool if we could offer that, but we simply can’t do that just to make you happy.

Gus, you’ve got so much going for you, and you’ll find what you’re looking for. But it’s just not us.

We’re happy knowing that many great coaches find our commitment to mediocrity irresistible. We are sure we will find the right person to over promise and underwhelm. Or simply wreck a bike with a mistress at the worst possible time.

We wish you all the success in the world **


Arkansas Razorbacks

**P.S. we would still love for you to be our head coach even though we are pretending it is ok.

In addition to the newspaper article the Razorbacks have placed flyers at all the local Waffle House locations in the Auburn area.

When reached for comment, the Auburn University athletic department was too busy adjusting shelf space for new trophies.


No Comment

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *




News Alerts

Signup for our daily news alerts or weekly recap

Razorbacks, Fearing Rejection, Release Love Letter to Gus Malzahn