Tiger Woods Says Withdrawing from Master’s is an April Fool’s Joke

JUPITER ISLAND, Fla. — Tiger Woods said Thursday that his planned withdraw from the Master’s to undergo back surgery and rehabilitation was merely an April Fool’s joke and that he would not only play but also win at Augusta next week.

Woods told the Rock City Times that he has always wanted to crack a good April Fool’s joke and he thought this was the perfect opportunity. He announced on his Web site Tuesday, April 1, that he underwent surgery Monday and would need several weeks to recover so he would miss the Master’s April 11-14 and several other tournaments.

On Thursday, he recanted citing April Fool’s.

“Life is about trying different things,” Woods said. “I tried marriage once. That didn’t work. I’ve tried dating all sorts of floozies. That was fun until I got caught. Hence the whole marriage not working thing. I’ve tried three different golf coaches as a PGA Tour pro and just as many caddies.”

“I thought to myself, why not try and be funny? When people think of Tiger Woods, they don’t think of funny. Well, I’m gonna try to change that.”

Unfortunately, his fellow competitors and other golf legends didn’t think the joke was funny.

“Epic fail Tiger, epic fail,” Arnold Palmer said. “Sometimes people need to stick with what they are good at. Tiger is good at golf. Andrew Dice Clay is funny. That’s why Tiger wins on the PGA Tour and Andrew wins in the comedy club. Let’s keep it that way.”

Heard of the April Fool’s joke, Tiger’s nemesis, Sergio Garcia said, “C’mon Man. Ain’t nobody got time for that.”

Woods, 38, has won 14 majors and is trying to top Jack Nickalus’ record of 18 major golf championships. He is also just four shy of Sam Snead’s record for PGA Tour wins, another record he hopes to surpass.

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Tiger Woods Says Withdrawing from Master’s is an April Fool’s Joke