LITTLE ROCK – Demolition was halted today on the former Cinema 150/The Village building at Asher and University today when crews discovered the 1949 UALR football team hidden beneath the building.
All 47 members of the Junior Rose Bowl winning team were found alive and in good health after the demolition team uncovered a hidden room under the floor below the stage.
“We removed the back wall and the stage when a group of kids standing around watching the demolition said they heard yelling,” demolition expert Eugene Davis. “We stopped and the kids ran over and began digging. They found 47 men down there who seemed to only be pissed about the dust in their popcorn.”
Medical officials say the team, who went undefeated in the final season of UALR (then Little Rock Junior College) football, has survived for the past 12 years underground on popcorn, milk duds, and sour patch kids that were dropped between the cracks at the old cinema. Aside from being nutrient deprived and sensitive to light, the group was in good health.
Members of the football team were reportedly locked away in a secret basement of the theater in 2003 by then UALR Athletic Director Chris Peterson. Desire for a UALR football team had reached an all time high in 2003, led mostly by the former members of the team. According to sources Peterson held a ceremony for the members then promptly kidnapped all of the members following the reception.
“You are right, I did it to get rid of all support for a football team. If the former players disappeared then no one would want a team,” Peterson said while being escorted to a police vehicle. “And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for you meddling kids.”